华诤回到家时,家人都睡了。第二天起得晚,下楼吃早餐时,父母亲和姑姑都出去买东西了,只见表姐cindy穿着牛仔裤和t-shirt,光着脚丫子,一只腿踩缩在椅子上,正对着餐桌坐着吃东西呢。 “hey,matty,finallygetup,ah?” 比华诤大一岁的表姐cindy岳思思是abc,也就是传说中的“香蕉人”。她短发烫得卷卷地贴着头皮,瘦瘦的,皮肤故意晒得比较黑,眼睛很大。这种外貌在美国可是很吃得开的——美国人以为,东方女孩就应该长得又黑又立体才叫有神韵。 她打的招呼让华诤不好意思地抓抓头发。宋云贞正从院里进来,关上门,回身对华诤道: “哟,大宝贝儿,起了?” 站在华母旁的菲佣,用生硬的中文道: “少爷吃什么早餐?” “随便” 华母道: “那和姐姐一样吃牛奶面包?” “好,谢谢奶奶” 华母接过菲佣手里的餐盘,边把早餐放在餐桌上边道: “昨天怎么这么晚才回来?” “granny,hedefinitelyhadsomelastnight.” cindy的脸对着外祖母解释,眼睛却是看着华诤挤眉弄眼。华诤有点怀疑自己的英文水平: “ididn’thaveanythinglastnight.icamebackandiwentstraighttosleep.” cindy十指张开,双掌在耳朵两边朝外举: “eww~liar!whateveryousay.hey,whateveryousay!” 华诤觉得自己肯定跟表姐有什么误会,拉开椅子坐在她对面: “i’mnotlying.idon’thaveto.ok?fyi,whatdoyoumeanwhenyousaidihadsome?hadsomewhat?” “sex!ofcourse!” 华诤一口牛奶喷在餐桌上。 cindy笑着接道: “whatdoyouthinkimean?” 华母忙过来给他拍着背: “怎么了?宝贝,慢点喝!吃饭不要说话嘛。” 华诤边抽张纸捂嘴咳嗽,边朝祖母摆摆手、示意她不用帮忙。华母便拿了抹布来擦桌子: “你们姐弟俩说什么呢?” 华诤忙道: “没什么,没什么。” “it’soktohavesex,matty,youdon’thavetolie.igetit——youareagrown-up,youareinarelationship,youhavesex.that’swhatpeopledo.hey,ibetyourgirlfriendmustbereallyawesometokeepyouthatlong.” 华诤连连朝表姐摇手: “wedidn’thavesex.we’veneverhadsex.” “whaaaat?!” cindy看华诤的眼神,让华诤觉得自己就像来自侏罗纪世界的恐龙。 “youserious?” “yeah.whywouldiliesomethingaboutthat?” 华诤顿了顿,既然表姐这么光明磊落,他也不想做个萎缩怕事的人,便露出一个无奈的苦笑,坦白道: “althoughireallywantto.tobehonest,it’skillingme!youknow,thewholenosexthing.” “soyouarehot?” “whatdoyouexpect?i’veneverhadsexinmyentirelife.lookatme,sis.!i’malwayshot!ok?however,mygirlfriend,she’stooshy.idon’twanttoscareheroff.” cindy深感自己和这个表弟在文化上的差异鸿沟深深,两人根本鸡同鸭讲: “hey,matty,sweety,look,yougottahavesexwithyourgirlfriend,yougottahavewildsexwithyourgirlfriend——that’swhatboyfriendsdo.that’swhatwouldkeepyourgirlfriendcloser.icanensureyouthatyouarenottheonlyonewho’shot.womenhaveneeds.” “really?” cindy翻了一个“那还用说”的白眼,把脚放下来,正襟危坐,好像要准备谈什么事关国计民生的国家大事: “i’magirl,right?i’vehadboyfriends.igotasayinthisstaff.yougottabelieveme,matty,markmywords——womenhaveneeds.justgoandmeettheneeds.makeyourwomanhappy.” 华诤觉得表姐背后放着万道金光——简直就是上天派来拯救他的天使! “butidon’tknowhowtobringitup.ilovemygirlfriendtoomuch.idon’twant...” “wowwow” cindy双掌向外,像在推着什么东西: “waitaminute,matty,mathew,mattwa.waitaminute!yousaidaaayouloveher?areyousure?loveisabigword.wedon’tuseitunlesswereallyfeelit.” “yeah.ican’tbemoresure.iloveher.eversincethefirsttimeisawher,i’vebeenfallinglovewithher.actually,asdaysgoby,iloveherevenmore.look,sheisthesweetestgirli’veeverseen.ifanything,i’mhopelesslyanddesperatelyinlovewithher.” cindy脸绷紧了,眼珠子在瞪大的眼眶中转了转: “wow,ok.loudandclear.great.goodforyou,matty!goodforyou.soyouareinlove.doessheloveyouback?” 提这一茬,华诤有点黯然神伤,耸耸肩: “well,iguessnot.idon’tthinkso.” 伸长手臂拍着表弟的肩膀,cindy慢慢道: “hey,haveyoueverheardthepoem?” “whatpoem?” “’tobewithawomanwhodoesn’tloveyouback,ismorelonelythantobealone’” 为这句话,姐弟俩默哀了几秒钟。华诤想起什么,拍拍桌子道: “focus!sis.focus!anyway,idon’twanttomakethingsweirdbetweenmeandmygirlfriend.arethereanytips?anythingwouldleadusto```youknow?” “ok” cindy摊摊手,笑道: “youarefamily.technically,youaremylittlebrother.i’myourbigsister.andiloveyou.ido.hence,iwouldhelpyououtwheneveryouneedme.firstofall” cindy右手从左手心里扳出一个手指头: “yougottagetaroomforyoutwo.bealone,forgodsake!” 不过,鉴于中美意识上的差异,cindy还是不放心地补充问了一句: “isyourgirlfriendokwiththat?” 华诤点点头: “yeah.icanmakethathappen.” “ok.secondly,thereisastorywhichwouldmakeyourgirlfriendwanttohavesexwithyouvoluntarily.however,yougottastateitright.” 有这么神奇的事? “whatstory?” 华诤正以空前绝后高涨热忱的态度在学习,大人们就回来了。华珮进门时,远远听到他们两姐弟的话,便喝道: “思思,你忘记我们之间承诺了?在家不准说中文!” 岑兰笑道: “是不许说英文吧?” 华珮笑道: “唉,都被她气糊涂了。是,不准说英文!在家不准说英文!” 岳思思站起来,华诤抓住她的短袖阻止她离开: “什么故事?” 岳思思为难道: “对不起,你姑姑不准我说英文。我不知道用中文怎么说,我中文不好,我不会翻译。”